Monday, May 31, 2010

You Were The Little Rock In My Shoe

Yes, you heard me. You heard me right. I just figured it out. Not now, but this morning, coming back from church. It’s a something that seems to be quite relieving, this going to church thing. I was walking quietly, with a million of thoughts in my head... mostly of you, unfortunately for me... and the thing is... well, I stopped. In the middle of the sidewalk, I stopped. I took off my left shoe, and I got that little rock that was bothering me. It seems that I realized I had it there only this morning, how odd! It must have been bothering me for months, because I had a little mark on my foot. So small I barely noticed at home, when I checked the damage.
I kept on thinking that this was what you were too.
You were the little rock in my shoe.
My left shoe, to be more specific.
(It didn’t seem to have anything to do with the heart, but that’s the way I saw it.)
So in my desperate attempt to get rid of all the memories that seem to haunt me (these days more than ever, I don’t seem to get it why… hmm... maybe it's because I bought a book last week, and its title made me think of you), I came to this answer: you were the little rock that bothered me for months. And I used to like you there, didn't even notice you… until today! But this must be a big step forward, right? I mean... I must be figuring out some things about myself and maybe even about you.
So it’s a step forward, that’s how I choose to see it.
And another medicine, a painful one, but still a medicine for my recovery, is you ignoring me. I know, I know… I’m too much of a coward to just spill it out, so I really hope you'll understand it yourself. And come to respect my decision. Because God knows I don’t want any more male best friends. I’m sick and tired of being a guy’s best friend, especially if I’m in love with the idiot, and he doesn’t even notice it.
Anyhow...
Goodbye, dear little rock in the left shoe!
I hope I won’t miss you!

Not yours,
(at least not anymore)
Me

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